The Jennifer Lopez breakup from her husband of seven years, Marc Anthony seemed to take Tinseltown by surprise. Rumors, of course, have been flying and one of the most commonly cited is that the split was a result of disagreements over religion. It seems that she wanted a deeper involvement than he did.
It's a common bone of contention in modern marriages. The religions may have different names and beliefs around the world but one person in the relationship feels a deeper level of sincerity or commitment to the tenants of their beliefs it can cause problems in the marriage. As far as Hollywood is concerned this is one marriage split that might actually be seen as normal.
It wasn't about wild parties, binge drinking, multiple affairs on every continent, or any of the other usual suspects. This was even a couple who had managed to make hectic schedules work for them. There were even rumors that they were planning a reality show together with American Idol producers.
But, could the split have been prevented?
It's hard to see the other point of view when it comes to something as deep, intimate, and personal as a spiritual calling. These might be one of the most difficult problems in a marriage or relationship to mediate. Faith is extremely personal and it changes and evolves over time.
What this means is that no matter how much or little you hold true to the tenants of your belief system today, things can be different five or ten years from now. Life changes people and can have a profound impact on their belief systems and their commitments to them.
But there are things that can be done in situations like this that can help both sides see where the other person is in the argument and gain a little insight and even empathy to help find resolution that's agreeable to both parties.
The problems arise when neither person is willing to bend. This is usually when the entire marriage becomes a giant "rehash" of the one disagreement.
Here's what you might want to do if religion or faith is becoming a sticking point of conflict in your own marriage.
Discuss What the Specific Problems Are
Sometimes the problems aren't what you think they are. Remember that if you're dealing with someone that doesn't share your level of commitment to faith, it's a safe bet to assume you're going to have different feelings on the priority of your religious beliefs in the marriage.
You have to find out what the specific problems are before you can solve them. Sometimes, it's as simple as insecurity. Other times it's jealousy, to some degree, because you're investing so much time and attention to religion while devoting less and less to your marriage partner.
Then there are times when it's the change in your attitude about religion that's a bone of contention. Your spouse believed you felt one way and now things seem to have changed. It can feel like a bit of a betrayal for some people. Others just take a little while to get used to the change. Some never do. You can't solve the problem of religion until you work out why it's a problem.
You are fortunate in many ways. You don't have the celebrity spotlight or paparazzi microscope bearing down on you. This means that you have the opportunity to work things out with the one you love in some degree of peace. You may even be able to figure out how to get your ex back and make your relationship work where J-Lo and Marc Anthony were unable to do so. Need a little help getting started? Check out this FREE video ->
http://www.getyourexbacknow.com/just_break_up3.html that very well may put your feet on the exact right path for relationship success.
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