Spending quality time together is one of the best ways to save your marriage after cheating. Unfortunately, not everyone is on the same page when it comes to what defines quality time. It's really important to make time for each other in any marriage but if you happen to be married to someone who actually NEEDS to spend time with you in order to FEEL loved by you, it is more important than you may realize.
Dr. Gary Chapman, a prominent couples' counselor and author, believes that there are 5 love languages we all speak. These are the ways in which certain people feel love. For some people, the only way they feel truly loved and secure in that love is when their spouse spends quality time with them on a regular basis.
Of course, this doesn't help you define what defines "quality" when it comes to the time you spend with your spouse. These are some things you need to consider when you make plans for real quality time with your spouse as you work together to save your marriage after cheating.
1) Undivided attention. This means that going to movies, sporting events, musicals, or plays is not a good example of spending quality time together. When you attend events like this your attention is divided by what is going on – on the stage or on the field and not devoted to what is going on with the person sitting beside you. Even meals are out because you're not focusing on your spouse but on what's happening on your plate instead.
2) Time alone. Quality time with the family is great. You need to spend time with the children when everyone isn't buried inside his or her favorite tech toy. But, you also need that time alone with your spouse if you want to make things right in your marriage after you've cheated on your spouse. This time alone is when you'll talk about the future, share your dreams, and really grow together as a couple in spite of mistakes you may have made along the way.
3) Let it be all about the two of you. Don't waste the rare opportunities when you are able to enjoy quality time together discussing everything but the important things between the two of you. Don't let interruptions spoil the night. Most importantly, don't find something to keep you distracted so that you aren't addressing the issues at hand.
The worst mistake you can make when married to someone who speaks the love language of quality time is to break dates, not pay attention to your spouse, or allow distractions to encroach on the time you do have for one another. If you don't get things under control you'll have to find out
how to get your ex back instead of how to save your marriage though. So be careful.
But, the hard part is often getting your spouse to agree to spending quality time with you after you've been caught cheating. Do you need a little help in that department? Be sure to click here =>
http://www.getyourexbacknow.com/just_break_up3.html for step by step instructions on how to get your spouse's attention so you can save your marriage.
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